How You Can Benefit From Trading With Detachment

Everybody, it’s Michael Martin, happy Friday. So the topic today comes in via email and it’s like, Michael, I’m in a drawdown and I’m finding it difficult to have a good attitude. Okay? I’ve been there a million times, right? Again, I think it was yesterday or Tuesday, I talked about it being apathetic. These days it’s just like the trades come, you put ’em on, you’re powerless over the results. You repeat the process over and over, and you learn to detach yourself from the outcome of any one particular trade because you’re just doing the same thing that you would do each and every day. And it’s a really good spot to be in. So you can’t really tell when I do these shows if I’m making or losing money, and it’s authentic because at the end of the day, it’s not like I don’t care, but I don’t care.
I put the trades on. Markets are going to go, been doing it the same way for quite some time. Market’s going to go where they’re going to go. And I mean, Microsoft is a market, sugars and market. So that’s what I mean by markets. They’re going to go where they’re going to go. I’m powerless. The best I can do is to anticipate the moves, put myself in the right place at the right time when I’m very lucky in that I had good parents. And so my sister and I grew up pretty well mannered because that was, we didn’t have a choice. So everything was, thank you, and please, and I think, so what happens when you’re in a drawdown? Okay, go back to the four pillars of what I think you need. You need good attitude, you need discipline, you need persistence, and you have to have determination.
So building upon that, when you find yourself in a spot where you’re kind of aggravated, or I don’t want to say feeling bad for yourself, but in your attitude is waning, it might have to do with your trading performance. Maybe it has something to do with the people you’re with. Maybe you are starting to not like a client or two. So one of the tricks that I did to get back into feeling good and having a good attitude, because it’s really hard to win when you’re in a bad mood or if you’re SU all the time. So the first thing I would do is would in those days we didn’t have smartphones, so you’d have index cards, you’d have a Rolodex where you could scroll through. And what I would do is I’d say, okay, well who are the people? Who are the people that are most important to my career?
My execution traders, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Maybe a certain client with whom you have a really good relationship. And I would literally take out a pen and an index card or a piece of paper, and I’d write down four or five names of these people. And then what I would do is I would call ’em up on the phone and I’d say, Hey, Gerard, it’s Mike. Hey Mike, what do you got? And I’d be like, oh, I don’t have an order today or at the moment right now, but I just wanted to take a minute and thank you for working with me. It means a lot to me to have you in my life,
And I love you, and I’m really grateful for the spot that I am in my life, and I’m glad that you’re part of it. It helps me a lot. I don’t take the time enough out to tell you how much I appreciate you because we’re always so busy with orders and fills and this and that and the other thing. And most people are stunned because who the hell gets a call like that? But that does so much, a creates so much abundance in your psyche to be to tell other people that they’re appreciated. What do you think the universe is going to do for you? The universe is typically going to find a way to reciprocate, to help you feel appreciated. And when you’re in a pissy mood or when you’re in a drawdown and you’re feeling like, I don’t want to deal with this shit anymore, and you want to just give the double bird to the market, we’ve all been there.
I’ve never actually picked up hardware and smashed it, but I have gone for long walks only because I can envision the amount of embarrassment that you have to feel after you go on tilt like that. I mean, imagine of me, of all people, if I went on Tilt and there was a video of me having a breakdown, that would be funny, wouldn’t it? So having said that, then I’d go to the next person and say, again, similar type of a deal. I appreciate these things about you and what you do, because it helps me be a better version of me. And I’m handling big money for people. Some of them who I’m never going to meet. You handle pension money. The beneficiaries of that money are people you’re never going to meet, but you can still have a big impact on their lives by doing a good job. And so what you find is after you’ve made three or four calls like that, you start to feel really good because you’re focusing on good stuff. The people who are important to you, which you should be talking to those people a lot anyway. You know, don’t have to send them flowers or buy ’em Amazon gift cards all the time, but you should be taking them out to dinner and paying the bill, right?
Because it does something for your emotional constitution. And at the end of the day, if you are not in a good mood, it’s really hard to succeed at anything in life if you’re grumpy. No one wants to work with a grump. No one wants to work with a victim or a martyr. So I don’t know why people do that. I look at social media because I’m usually on a listen only mode, and I’m like, when you start to complain, it means you’re weak. And why would you want to broadcast to the world that you’re weak? I don’t know. I talk about my feelings here because it’s genuine and authentic, and there’s really not too many feelings that you’ll go through in your journey trading, whether you’re retail at home, do it yourself or prop desk person, hedge fund person that I haven’t
Already felt and will continue to feel I don’t have. I feel all the feelings that you feel. What I don’t do is I don’t let the good ones nor the bad ones, sabotage, right? Because the good ones can sabotage too. Some people, we talked about greed when some people, one way they get greedy, and this is something I should have mentioned the other day, is they start to coast. Yeah, yeah, I’m pro trader. Do what I want now. Rules change. Rules change. When you’re a winner, and obviously I’m being facetious, but you can drop your guard and that begins to draw down. And then you’re like, Hmm, I’m not going to let that happen again because I brought it on myself. But anyway, don’t want to blather on one of the quick ways. Again, you could, and it doesn’t have to be you’re, if you’re trading, it’s good because all those people are kind of in and around your probably somewhere near your concentric circles, in near the bullseye of your concentric circles from your professional or your trading career. Maybe you call an old school teacher, Dr, and talk to them. Don’t send it off in an email. Be a human being. Pick up the phone, call them and say, Hey, you know, might not remember me. I took your class and it really had a big impact on me. Here’s what I’m doing now. I’m a big success, and I just wanted to take a minute and thank you for being your inimitable self and doing what you do. I’ve benefited greatly from that, and I just wanted to thank you. I do that all the time.
You could find good friends. And like I said, one way to combat loneliness too is call the person who you think is most lonely in your world. So then you start to feel good about having helped them. It changes your attitude, man, attitudes, everything. So if you have a trick that you use, I don’t have all the answers. I only have the stuff that I’ve come up with for myself, but you might have a better one. And if you do, drop it in the comments because everyone could benefit. That’s what this thing is. This is like our little, I don’t really do discords, but let’s, let’s call it a day there. I appreciate y’all being here. I hope you have had had a great trading week, and you have good plans for the weekend. Remember, treat yourself and I’ll see you Monday.

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